Short term memory, and sometimes loss

Dear Blog Diary,

Just saying, weed kills your short term memory.

Memory is a slippery slope in the 1st place. Try it. Take the biggest moments and verify.

I distinctly remember being in the back of Mrs. Adamson’s class in 7th grade doing some project on the floor. She turned on the box TV on the cart (God I’m old). I pop up to see twin towers on fire. We didn't celebrate my birthday that year.

Thing is, memory is a horrible source of record.

Just from instinct, the stories we tell are skewed to be self-glorifying and probably a bit sensationalized. Right off the bat, we’re in fiction based on perspective. So to a degree, you’re already wondering if this person is blowing smoke.

Then, if the story is proven inaccurate even slightly, then that person is a liar with immoral intentions and an agenda for their own benefit.

And just for fun, if a person recalls an event inaccurately on minor details, is the story itself untrue? (No bullshit – just doing the math, apparently I was in 8th grade on 9/11. Am I full of shit now? Do you think I lied on purpose?)

We think of our memories as a vault that we go into, and the memory has not changed. We’re so sure of ourselves. We lived it. You weren’t there. Speaking my truth and criticizing that is criticizing my dignity as a human being.

Rubbish.

To those who I've known 15ish+ years, chances are high that I don’t distinctly remember meeting you. I remember meeting Ofori in John Reineke’s backyard in 2nd grade. Ofori doesn’t, and this is a man where we've been through every stage of life together.

I confess I've been struggling with letting people go. It's never personal. We have our own shit going on, little by little we become strangers. Some people you grow out of. Some need to stay in the past. Still love there, but it's not like you know me. Even your memory of me is whatever you want it to be. For what it's worth, I genuinely think today Eric is the coolest, best Eric yet. In that, it would be really cool to meet some of you again.

Recently I got so triumphantly stoned that I forgot that I was wearing a hat, and lemme tell ya – I was so tickled surprised with joy when I found out.

Best,

E

#ARTiculate